Posts by Shelley
#338- What Happens When You Avoid Confrontation?
#338- What Happens When You Avoid Confrontation? Most people don’t like confrontation, avoiding it like the plague. It’s a way of hiding out. It’s also a stressful way to live because it creates a lot of internal and external drama. You may be afraid that someone will get mad at you, judge you or even leave…
Read More#337- Journey of Attachment: In Or Out, Get Off The Fence
#337- Journey of Attachment: In Or Out, Get Off The Fence Are you stuck in a state of limbo, waiting for something to change? Maybe you’re in a dysfunctional relationship, hoping your partner will make a decision for the both of you. You’re physically present, but don’t look at why you are choosing to stay while…
Read More#336- When Forcing Pushes People Away
#336- When Forcing Pushes People Away As a partner, friend or parent you can always share your opinion and suggest what you would do in their situation, but you can never truly force them to do something. It’s ultimately their choice. Even with the parent/child relationship where you do have some control over their actions, you…
Read MoreSurviving to Thriving: Kim Boudreau Smith
Surviving to Thriving: Overcoming My Darkest Moment Kim Boudreau Smith In this episode of “Surviving to Thriving: Overcoming My Darkest Moment,” I talk with coach, speaker and creator of Her Bold Voice, Kim Boudreau Smith. Growing up Kim learned to be seen and not heard. She became a corporate “yes” woman, living her life based…
Read More#335- Journey of Attachment: Do You Love ‘em And Leave ‘em?
#335- Journey of Attachment: Do You Love ‘em And Leave ‘em? Have you ever gotten to the point in a relationship where you can’t stand things anymore? Maybe it’s a past relationship—or something you’re going through right now. No matter what you do or how much effort you put in, nothing changes, yet you hope your…
Read More#334- Abandoning Everything For The Next Bright Shiny Object
#334- Abandoning Everything For The Next Bright Shiny Object Do you feel restless in some area of your life? Maybe you’re avoiding something. And instead of focusing on what you’re avoiding, you direct your attention toward some bright shiny object you believe is the answer. All your effort is put in that direction—you’ve figured it out!…
Read More#333- Journey of Attachment: A Servant to Neediness
#333- Journey of Attachment: A Servant to Neediness Depending on someone else for your emotional needs is a powerless position… but being a servant to someone else’s needs is just as powerless. I’m not talking about being supportive or caring, both of which are important in a healthy relationship. I’m talking about assuming the responsibility of…
Read More#332- Shame And Our Stories That Create It
#332- Shame And Our Stories That Create It Shame is a universal emotion, but it is based on our own personal stories. Long ago you developed stories of right and wrong; good and evil. You then used those stories to direct your behavior. If you acted “wrongly” according to your story, shame likely resulted. Because shame…
Read More#331- Journey of Attachment: How Avoidants Try To Avoid Pain
#331- Journey of Attachment: How Avoidants Try To Avoid Pain Avoidants avoid—that’s what they do! And when they try to avoid pain, they remain stuck in a state of struggle (although they don’t know they’re in struggle). If you are an avoidant, your emotions are often left unbothered and undisturbed. You may go through life believing…
Read More#330- Patterns Are Difficult. How To Break Them!
#330- Patterns Are Difficult. How To Break Them! Patterns are like bad habits: very hard to break. This is because they are old, usually developed in childhood as a means of emotionally adapting to situations. They are based on negative beliefs like I’m not good enough, I’m unlovable, I will never amount to anything, etc. Over…
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