Relationships
Monday Tip: Comparison Is the Thief of Joy
Monday Tip: Comparison Is the Thief of Joy In my early days of coaching, I looked at how other coaches were marketing themselves, thinking I needed to be like them to succeed. I looked at celebrities who got divorced and remarried all while I was still single, thinking, “What is WRONG with me?” I beat…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Be Wrong
Monday Tip: Be Wrong Oh boy do we love being right. That “I told ya so” can feel so satisfying, but why? What do we actually gain by being right? A feeling of superiority? Validation that we’re worthy? Those feelings are temporary and come from a state of lack. When they disappear, we need something…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Give Yourself Some Lovin’
Monday Tip: Give Yourself Some Lovin’ Yep, it’s almost here again: Valentine’s Day. We’ve created all this pomp and circumstance around one single day, but rarely is it the “best love day ever.” In fact, better titles might be “best day for crazy-ass expectations” or “best day for hating singlehood” or “best day to avoid…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Spill the Beans
Monday Tip: Spill the Beans Raise your hand if you’re keeping a secret from your partner, your family, your friends, dating prospects, etc. Maybe you don’t consider it a secret—you’re just leaving bits out or cherry-picking what you share. Everyone does that, right? It can be as “innocuous” as hiding shopping receipts or as big…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Spot Emotional Unavailability
Monday Tip: Spot Emotional Unavailability Last week’s tip was about not ignoring red flags, so this week I’m going a step further. One red flag I see people ignore all the time (or don’t actually see) is emotional unavailability. What do I mean by emotional unavailability? Someone who: Isn’t emotionally present or connected Doesn’t match…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Don’t Ignore Red Flags
Monday Tip: Don’t Ignore Red Flags We’ve all done this. There’s something we want (a relationship, a job, a house, etc.) so we ignore the signs that tell us to “abort mission.” The house’s electrical is shot, there’s a bunch of termite damage and the roof leaks… but it’s a beautiful Victorian and has so…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Write a Letter to Your Honeybun
Monday Tip: Write a Letter to Your Honeybun Last week I talked about burying your fairy tale and choosing reality, so this week we’re not just going to focus on reality… we’re going to make it happen. I’ll start with a quick personal story: When I was dating, I used to pick apart the guys…
Read MoreMonday Tip: Bury Your Fairy Tale
Monday Tip: Bury Your Fairy Tale Fairy tales can be fun fantasies when we’re kids, but in adulthood they can be incredibly painful. How long have you waited for your knight in shining armor or your perfect princess to show up? Someone who will rescue you from your ho-hum life and tell you how amazing…
Read MoreYou’re Not Crazy. What Relationship Anxiety Is Trying To Tell You
You’re Not Crazy. What Relationship Anxiety Is Trying To Tell You Why hasn’t she called me back? Will he ever commit? How can I get her back? Did I totally screw this up? Does he love me? AM I CRAZY? Relationship anxiety can make you feel like Jekyll and Hyde–calm and secure one minute, then…
Read MoreWhy Won’t My Partner Respect Me? It’s About Setting Healthy Relationship Boundaries
Why Won’t My Partner Respect Me? It’s About Setting Healthy Relationship Boundaries Debbie’s partner called her lazy because she didn’t organize the garage last weekend as planned. When she shrunk his sweater he snapped, “You’re lucky I stick around.” She dismissed his comments as “overly dramatic” and “half joking,” but still baked him cookies to…
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